Nickel & Dimed by Barbara Ehrenreich

Nickel & Dimed by Barbara Ehrenreich


Barbara Ehrenreich is an established author and magazine writer with an educational background in biology. One day, while meeting with and editor from Harper's to discuss future projects, she came up with the idea of doing an old-fashioned journalistic investigation by plunging herself into a specific environment and then recording her observations.

Actually, her original intention was for someone else to do the project, but the Harper's editor insisted she was the woman for the job. This method is an anthropological technique where the researcher is a "participant observer."

I looked up the phrase "participant observer" on the Internet. The website for the International Institute for Sustainable Development describes the technique this way: "The method derives from the insight that you derive from a community's values, dynamics, internal relationships, structures and conflicts best from their observed actions, rather than from their (normative) statements of what "is". The participant observer attempts immersion, to the extent permitted, in local life in order to understand and document how things work." I also understand that this methodology sometimes involves consulting individuals within the demographic to be observed to get their opinion as to the steps of the process and the specifics proposed. I don't believe the author did this. I believe she asked the opinion of colleagues and friends, and used her own opinions and assumptions to decide on the specifics for this project.

Like any research technique, there are benefits and drawbacks as to the ultimate accuracy of the outcome of an observer's research. Participant observation is more accurate than surveys or statistics, as the research is hands-on. Being thrown into an environment reveals a bigger picture than words and numbers on a piece of paper.

The down side to this method is that the observations are subjective. The experiences of one observer can vary widely. Each individual human being has their own unique experience in life, and although there are commonalities in situations and environments, the view can become skewed if it is from only one perspective and not a wider sampling.

Barbara Ehrenreich began her research by first choosing a specific area of the United States in which to do her research. The locations she chose were in Florida, Maine, and Minnesota, three completely different areas of the United States and seemingly objective.

She would then look for a job. She specifically looked for entry-level type jobs for people without college degrees or special skills. To hide her education and impressive job experience she would state

on the job applications that she was a stay-at-home mother returning to the work force after a long period of time. This part was very believable. It's a typical scenario: A woman gets pregnant young, doesn't go to college, gets married, years later gets divorced, enters the work force for the first time at an older age with no experience, skills, or education.

This part was the most interesting of the project. Although I believe one month is not enough time to truly absorb what life is like for a person in a specific profession and/or job, I do believe one month was enough for a general idea, or a window to what life is like for the person she was pretending to be. I say this for several reasons. True exhaustion builds over time. Someone working eleven hours a day, six days a week for a month has an easier experience. If a person knows they only have to live this way for a month, it’s easier to live with, as there is an end in sight. The situation and mind-set is much different for someone who has no end in sight, and faces the strong possibility that the rest of their life will be just like this. The latter grim realization can cause a deep exhaustion; both depression and physical exhaustion combined.

Feeling truly jaded develops over a long period of time. The person she was pretending to be may have had a difficult childhood, had parents with similarly grim work experiences. There's a pain and desperation that only a person who has lived too long a certain way can feel. That said, I think her observations did give a general idea of how people feel and live in her chosen situations, through her personal experience and her observations and experiences with the people she encountered on this journey. I think she absorbed enough to write about it and give the general public a perspective on the specific professions observed.

Ms. Ehrenreich would take little breaks from her alternative lives periodically. She would share her observations with her friends. At one point, her friends opined that they were surprised she could have intelligent conversations and have things in common with the people she was dealing with. In her defense, she did chastise her friends who held that opinion.

Circumstances have nothing to do with intelligence. A person can have rotten luck in their lifetime. There can be unfortunate circumstances that lead to a lack of opportunities. Bad things happen to people. An intelligent person with poor circumstances that lead to a lack of educational opportunities can self-educate his or herself and actually carry on quite intelligent conversations. On the other hand, someone with a low I.Q. can graduate from Yale because of his or her family connections and not from any real merit.

She would then look for an affordable place to live. I believe this is the area where the author made assumptions. She calculated about how much she would be earning and searched for what would be considered typical housing for someone employed in the chosen profession of her research. What she assumed was that she could find something decent in her price range. This is also the one area where I disagreed with her process. She always looked for furnished apartments, as she was only staying there for a month. Generally, furnished apartments are hard to find.

People with a low income usually live in apartments that come unfurnished and furnish the space sparsely themselves. They generally have several roommates to share the rent, or move in with a relative.

Even though I disagree with some of her methods, such as the apartment issue, I believe her research was valid, useful, and fascinating. I also enjoyed her sarcasm toward the mundane, soul-killing practices of large corporations such as Wal-Mart and Menard’s. To get a true picture of a low income person’s life, one would have to live that life, but I think her brief experiences at least gave her readers a window into the realities of other lives.

I found this book interesting and relatable in the sense that you can never really walk in someone else's shoes, but you can get a taste.  Those of us living on the spectrum have a special understanding of each other.  I think if someone lived my life for a week or a month, they would get a taste of what it's like - maybe just the difficult things, but hopefully see some of the joy and the things I'm grateful for.


http://www.amazon.com/Nickel-Dimed-Not-Getting-America/dp/0805063897

Bertucci's

Due to a Groupon that was about to expire, we had dinner last night at Bertucci’s in Palos Hills.




There was no hostess and there was a small crowd of people waiting to check in or be seated. A man who appeared to be an owner or manager finally came over, seeming very frazzled. We were seated within 20 minutes of our arrival. They have a pretty outdoor area, but we weren’t offered the option of sitting out there. It was probably just as well – during our meal, I saw several people come in from outside, holding their bill and looking around as if they had not been attended to for some time. Our server was excellent. She was managing a sizeable station quite well. She asked if she could bring our soup out prior to the appetizer, as they were about to run out and she wanted to make sure we didn’t miss out on the cream of broccoli, which was yummy. I thought that was a nice touch.



I probably would not bring my autistic kids to this restaurant. The tables are close together, very European in style. There are no booths. When we’re out with our kids, we generally like to sit in a booth as “pinning” them in seems to help in avoiding problems when attempting to dine out. It’s an attractive restaurant, but I think the noisiness would also get my kids worked up.  There isn't a kids menu and there's a fee for splitting entrees.



For an appetizer, we had salami, fontinella and olives, tasty combination.



I had the veal piccata. It was a bit cold when received, but it tasted good, the lemon sauce was very nice, even though it could have used some capers. It was good, not great.



My husband had the breaded steak and rapini. He loved it. I tried some of the rapini, which was delicious and perfectly seasoned – cooked and seasoned just the way bitter greens should be prepared.



There was a sign outside that they are looking for servers. I think the problems we encountered were due to understaffing. I’ve also noticed in past experiences that many people redeem Groupons the day before they expire, so it is better to use the Groupon sooner than that date. I would return to Bertucci’s for dinner on a date night or with a group of friends, but most likely not with the kids. Their menu and prices can be seen at www.bertuccis.net.

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The bad news, then the good news

After being questioned in regard to the alleged vandalism incident, it was obvious which neighbor was the complainant. This neighbor is a renter, but is a relative of the owner of the unit, who is very vocal about what awful parents we are and coincidentally works for our village police department.




The detective I spoke to was incredibly rude. He made me feel like I was a murder suspect on a TV show. He stated he “knew I did it” because I obviously cannot handle my special needs children and “snapped.” He basically said if I admitted to something I didn’t do and paid to fix the car, nothing would happen, but if I told the truth and continued to deny I did this, terrible things would happen to me.



My husband and I went to look at the “vandalized” car, which looked like it had been in an accident. My husband and I suspect the car owner may have been in an accident, fled the scene and was now trying to blame the damage to her car on someone else. Frame us into paying for the damage to the car, intimidate us out of the neighborhood, kill two birds with one stone!  All this because one neighbor finds my special needs children annoying!



Finally, something good happened. I received a phone call from our village police chief. He was very nice and apologetic and wanted to get together and talk about the insensitivity of his officers. The meeting was very positive. I brought printouts through links from Autism Speaks that specifically address autism awareness among first responders. We came home with a bag of toys for the kids and a much higher opinion of the village we live in.



Yesterday, May 29th, I received a phone call from a disability rights specialist at the Attorney General’s office. I told her at this time, I did not want to pursue any action against the police officers who treated me poorly, at least right now. We’ll see what happens. What this taught me was that there are still people out there that feel it’s socially acceptable to mistreat special needs families and that we somehow ask for it. I am even more motivated now to spread awareness and provide support for all special needs individuals and their families!

I haven't written on here in quite some time, but due to recent events, I realize I need to.  Please see the below e-mail I sent out last week to various people in authority in the village where I live.  Follow-ups to this story soon.

I am a mother of two children with autism. My younger son suffers from

hyposensory issues and engages in repetitive behaviors such as kicking and

hitting walls, doors and windows. My son’s teachers and therapists have

taught me methods of redirecting him away from the behavior, but at times,

nothing works. I often apologize to my neighbors for this and am always

assured they understand I am doing my best and that the noise is only heard

minimally and does not bother them.

That said, we have had two autism-related wandering incidents that

thankfully were resolved quickly, but have been reprimanded harshly by our

neighbors, who don’t understand how unfortunately common this is with autism

kids, despite the best efforts of autism parents. We have burglar locks and

alarms on the inside of every window and both our doors have triple locks

that require multiple keys.

On Sunday, May 20, 2012, at around 10:00 a.m., I was sorting laundry and

was startled by a knocking on my bedroom window. When I opened the blinds,

there was a police officer standing there who said he needed to come

inside my condominium. He stated he had rung our doorbell several times. I

suffer from hearing damage, so I often do not hear the doorbell. Friends

and family generally call first so I know to listen for it. The officer

stated there had been a noise complaint. (Pursuant to our condo association

bylaws, noise is prohibited only between 10:00 p.m. and 7:00 a.m.) He also

said, “I’ve been out here before, my partner’s been out here before…” which

is incorrect, as this was the first I had ever heard of any noise complaint.

He asked me many irrelevant questions as to my activities and the activities

of my children that day. While he was there, my son started kicking the

patio door. The officer commented, “see, that’s glass, that could be

dangerous.” Really? He said my neighbors did not want to deal with my

child’s noise and that I should move. (Ironically, I found out later the complainant is a renter. 

I'm an owner.)  I replied that our condo had been on

the market for nearly two years, so we were doing our best to leave. After

he left, my children were crying and very upset by his rude, confrontational

behavior and it took me nearly two hours to calm them both down.

My husband was upset and called the police department. They verified this

was the first time any officer had come out to our home, but many noise

complaints had been made via telephone by the same person. They could not

give him the name of the person for obvious privacy reasons.

On Monday, May 21, 2012, at about 6:30 p.m., we were sitting down for

dinner. My husband said he wanted to check our mailbox before we ate. When

he opened the door, there were three officers blocking his way. They

asked if they could come in as they were barging their way into our condo

anyway. They told us there had been an attempted break-in to our building

and alleged vandalism to a car. We were grilled with questions as to our

activities that day (we were both at work most of the day). My husband saw

the garage door in question was open when he left for work at 3:00 a.m. I

saw the garage door in question was open when I left for work at 8:45 a.m.

and the allegedly vandalized car was not in the garage at 8:45 a.m. I was

reprimanded by an officer, “why didn’t you tell your neighbor her garage

door was open?” My husband was not going to knock on someone’s door at 3:00

a.m. and why would I knock on someone’s door when they weren’t home? If the

vandalism occurred in the garage, why did she wait until dinnertime to

report it? Isn’t it possible the vandalism occurred during the day,

wherever she was?

I didn’t see that anyone else in our building was questioned in regard to

the alleged occurrence. Is the autism family automatically suspect of

criminal activity for some reason? I felt harassed and bullied by the

officers and felt violated the way they barged into my home, interrupting a

family dinner.

Bullying of autistic individuals and their families has been prominent in

the news of late. The Chicago Police Department and several suburban police

departments have participated in autism sensitivity programs. I think this

would be in the best interest of this Police Department to avoid future

litigation regarding harassment.

The Music Station

One of the toughest things about bringing an autistic child out in public (or any small child for that matter) is their inability to sit still for a movie or theatrical performance. Music Station is a fairly new business in the space formerly occupied by World Folk Music Company at 1808 West 103rd Street in Beverly. I received a Facebook message from an old friend about bringing my boys to a Yo Gabba Gabba puppet show at Music Station. Usually bringing my boys anywhere from the Beverly Arts Center to the Shedd Aquarium is a fiasco, but I decided to bring my 5-year-old, figuring the $5 adult/$3 child admission wouldn’t be much of a loss if we had to leave after 10 minutes.

What a pleasant surprise! The show was a perfect experience for my son. There was a lot of audience participation – the kids were given big toothbrushes to brush the teeth of the characters, combs to brush their hair, sponges on sticks to give the characters a bath – very sensory. The kids were not forbidden, but encouraged, to run up and down the aisles during the show. There were balloons and beach balls being volleyed around the whole time and no one gave me a dirty look when my son crawled under several seats to get a wayward balloon. The length was perfect, about an hour.

What a relieving and refreshing afternoon! The experience for the price was fantastic. We will be back!

PANDAS: Strep and OCD

One of the most frustrating things about living with autism is dealing with the unknowns. We don’t know for sure why this happened or how this happened to our child. We know of some things that might help, some things that definitely help (like speech therapy and OT), but we have no idea what our child’s future will be like as far as how much they can recover and function in society.

I listened to an interesting episode of The Autism Podcast recently. The guest was Beth Maloney, author of “Saving Sammy.” When Beth’s son was in middle school, he was diagnosed with OCD and later Tourette’s. Sammy was confined to home and faced being institutionalized for life. Sammy, Beth and their family had to deal with the stigma of a mental disorder, much as those of us who deal with autism do. She made a statement that really struck a chord in me. There are as many kids in the U.S. with OCD as there are with diabetes. Something like diabetes, a physical disorder, is treated with sympathy by society, but a mental disorder like OCD, Tourette’s or autism is treated like an embarrassment. This isn’t to say physical disorders do not deserve sympathy, of course they do, but mental disorders deserve the same compassion.

Long story short, Beth was convinced something else was going on in her son’s body. She had a gut feeling. She hounded the doctors to do more tests and it was ultimately found that he had a strep infection. Apparently there’s an OCD-type disorder caused by strep called PANDAS (Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders Associated with Strep). What I came away with from this podcast was that it’s amazing what parents can uncover through being relentless.

Beth Maloney has appeared on the “Today” show and “Bonnie Hunt.” “Saving Sammy” is up for an Multiple Sclerosis Society Books for Better Life Award.

www.autismpodcast.org

Pica

The definition of pica according to WebMD is “the persistent eating of non-nutritive substances.” Apparently the name comes from a mythical bird that would eat anything. I’ve also read that pica is the Latin word for magpie, also unpleasant, but then so is pica. I never heard of it until my autistic son started eating non-food items.

It started with chewing on his sleeves & collar, then moved on to upholstery, pillows, carpet, towels. We can’t keep any stuffed animals in his room anymore. He also had a cute talking Elmo chair that we had to put in storage. We couldn’t bring him to the park, or outside at all for that matter, because he would try to eat the dirt, sticks, stones, cigarette butts, you name it.

Then the nastiest of all – his poop. At the advice of his neurologist, I stocked up on one-piece pajamas (luckily it was right before Christmas, so they were readily available at most stores). She felt it was related to sensory-seeking behaviors. As soon as he gets home from school, the jammies go on and he stays in jammies as long as he’s home. The doctor’s theory was that if we prevented the behavior in this way, eventually he would forget about it and the habit would be broken.

My son has a wonderful preschool teacher and therapists at school. Through occupational therapy and re-directing the sensory-seeking, he has gotten better in recent months. We can actually bring him outside without incident and occasionally can let him wear his school clothes for the rest of the day, as well as the occasional two-piece jammies!

I’ve read this is common in children with autism, but I’ve yet to meet another child/parent/family who is living with this. It’s such a disturbing thing to live with. Not only is it strange and odd (and gross), there’s the constant worry of intestinal blockage, poisoning – especially in a non-verbal child who cannot tell you where it hurts or even point to where it hurts. I’d love to meet another family who has lived with this to see how they dealt with it. On the bright side, it has gotten better and I always have hope for his future.